As
is the case with just about everything else I choose to write about, I found myself
woefully ignorant of depression; its breadth and girth. It is, for example, most prevalent in the
45–64 age group, and women are more susceptible to some types than men. It has
been linked to heart disease, stroke, and obesity, and the number of people
diagnosed with depression increases by
about 20% per year.
Just
let your mind absorb that for a minute.
What if heart disease, cancer, or automobile fatalities increased by 20%
annually? It’d be pretty scary, huh?
As
with other afflictions, depression varies in degree, complexity, and
manifestation. There are different types
of depression; seasonal, situational, cyclothymic, and more. It’s kind
of a big deal.
No
one talked about depression back when I first suspected something was amiss. A person could be “out of sorts” or “feeling
blue”, but few dared admit to being depressed, as it was not only stigmatizing,
but also construed as a sign of weakness, especially in men. We’re talking late 1960’s to early 1970’s,
and people were not as “enlightened” in those days, or so we rationalize.
Being wholly unqualified to advise anyone dealing with depression – the victim or those around them - I have picked up the following nuggets from those in the know:
Never tell someone that is depressed to “snap out of it”
You would never admonish a person afflicted with cancer or diabetes to “snap out of it”, but we – out of frustration or ignorance – think nothing of grabbing someone by the collar and essentially ordering them to stop being depressed. Ditto for the motivational zingers “suck it up, buttercup”, “would you like some cheese with that whine?”, and “the world doesn’t revolve around you”. Depression sufferers are painfully aware of how they’re viewed by society at large, and depression is not something one can just “shake off”.
Don’t remind them how “good” they’ve got it
The
best analogy I can come up with for this one is: You like sporty cars, and they
have a sporty car, ergo they cannot be depressed. But people dealing with depression have a
different frame of reference than you, and having an Acura in the driveway and
the latest iPhone in their pocket does not equate to bliss. Nor does having what would outwardly appear
to be a good job or a happy home life. We
can never truly know the demons those around us wrestle with on a daily basis.
No one chooses to be depressed
Any
more than they’d choose to be stricken with Alzheimer’s or kidney failure or
deep vein thrombosis.
Sadly, many never seek treatment
As
overused as the term is, my goal here is simply to raise awareness of
depression, a disease which affects – directly or indirectly – at least one in
10 Americans. So, I’m going to encourage everyone that suffers from depression
to get help. If you have access to an Employee Assistance Program, take
advantage of it. If you fell and broke
your arm, you’d have that treated, wouldn’t you? If you were running a fever for days on end,
you’d go to the emergency room.
So
tell someone, and keep telling people until someone listens. It’s a disease, it’s not your fault, and we
must work together to destigmatize it.
Get help, get better, get on with your life. Then, get out there and help someone else.
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