Top 10 Ways to Beat the Heat

Well the dog days are here once more. Actually, I have no idea why they’re called the dog days, and to tell you the truth I don’t have the motivation to look it up. It’s just too hot. So, here are some suggestions to help you deal with the heat:

10. Strip down to underwear, lie face down on linoleum floor
9. Change PC and phone background to snowy landscape
8. More cold salads, fewer habanero chili dishes
7. Beer - lots and lots of beer
6. Set up mist tent with motion sensor in bathroom
5. Put “Miracle on 34^th Street” on endless loop
4. Drive through car wash with windows down
3. Replace thermometers with ones which display Celsius
2. Plug ears and run screaming whenever someone mentions the heat

And the #1 way to beat the heat:

1. Freezer pop underwear